What do you want to do about the wedding?
Let me begin by telling you, there is no wrong answer! The truth is, what you really want is for Covid to disappear and for everything to go back to the way it was. But since that isn’t going to happen, it’s time to move into finding out what you should be doing, or how you should be thinking about your wedding day.
Let me change the question and ask you something entirely new: What is it about your wedding that will bring you joy now and into the future?
And here is the kicker: BE HONEST WITH YOURSELF
Not everyone can say, “Just being married to the love of my life is all I need”. If you can say that with 100% honesty then you can stop reading now – you’re all set! Go elope and enjoy it to the fullest! Savor the moments with your hunny, get some sweet pics, and ride off into the sunset. That was easy!
But what if that’s not you? What if “being married” is only part of the picture. What if for you, looking back on a simple vow exchange will bring you both bitter and sweet memories? Is that what you want FOREVER? You know it’s not and somehow you’ve been made to feel guilty for saying so. Stop. The. Guilt. You deserve the same feelings during and after your wedding day that everyone else has. A sense of accomplishment, happiness, wonderment, and that feeling that “that was the best day of our lives” is totally within your right to desire!
Let me begin by telling you, there is no wrong answer! The truth is, what you really want is for Covid to disappear and for everything to go back to the way it was. But since that isn’t going to happen, it’s time to move into finding out what you should be doing, or how you should be thinking about your wedding day.
Let me change the question and ask you something entirely new: What is it about your wedding that will bring you joy now and into the future?
And here is the kicker: BE HONEST WITH YOURSELF
Not everyone can say, “Just being married to the love of my life is all I need”. If you can say that with 100% honesty then you can stop reading now – you’re all set! Go elope and enjoy it to the fullest! Savor the moments with your hunny, get some sweet pics, and ride off into the sunset. That was easy!
But what if that’s not you? What if “being married” is only part of the picture. What if for you, looking back on a simple vow exchange will bring you both bitter and sweet memories? Is that what you want FOREVER? You know it’s not and somehow you’ve been made to feel guilty for saying so. Stop. The. Guilt. You deserve the same feelings during and after your wedding day that everyone else has. A sense of accomplishment, happiness, wonderment, and that feeling that “that was the best day of our lives” is totally within your right to desire!
But – how to get there is going to look different now. It’s going to mean you have to examine and pull apart every tradition and plan that you were already looking forward to and make changes. Big ones in some cases.
So how do you figure out which things to change and which ones to hold on to with all your might? You’ve got to get introspective. There is not a one size fits all solution.
So how do you figure out which things to change and which ones to hold on to with all your might? You’ve got to get introspective. There is not a one size fits all solution.
Here are some questions that can guide you:
1) Looking back at past milestone events in your life, such as your 16th birthday or an important graduation, what memories stand out to you as the most important? Is it the rad party with you in the middle of smiling faces of friends and family – or is it the quiet moments with your parents and close family?
2) As
you’ve made your wedding preparations, which things were the “chores” and which
things were the most fun to do? Which
things will you regret not seeing come to life VS which can you let go easily?
3)
What is most fulfilling to you as you think about what your memories will be –
the idea that everything was said and done as a joining of lives, or the idea
that there was a huge celebration to commemorate your marriage?
If you are not going to be able to look back at the quiet,
emotional moments minus the party without regret, then you are in the category
that should strongly consider a full reschedule of your day. This will definitely be a bit of a sacrifice
of patience, but I believe for your personality it will be worth it because you
will never be able to shake that your wedding day was “less than” you wanted it
to be. You will have the full experience
of planning big for one very important day and seeing it all come to life
before your eyes in just 24 hours. You
will find fulfillment in that achievement and the memories you’ll have of the
total experience.
If you can honestly say that the party is only an added bonus to all the small, intimate moments, then you will probably be happy to have a smaller ceremony now, followed by a celebration of any kind as soon as it’s safe. This could mean something really soon as a traditional reception, or, even a few years out as a huge anniversary celebration. You can even throw in a vow renewal. But you’ll always look back on your small, original ceremony with fond memories of the warmth shared between you and your closest relatives.
If you can honestly say that the party is only an added bonus to all the small, intimate moments, then you will probably be happy to have a smaller ceremony now, followed by a celebration of any kind as soon as it’s safe. This could mean something really soon as a traditional reception, or, even a few years out as a huge anniversary celebration. You can even throw in a vow renewal. But you’ll always look back on your small, original ceremony with fond memories of the warmth shared between you and your closest relatives.
The best way to make this decision is to listen your
heart. Don’t be made to feel guilty
about what makes YOU happy – because it’s not the same for everyone. You only get one chance at this and whatever
you choose will become your memory for the rest of your lives together – make it
your own!
As the owner of Applause Weddings, I encourage you to watch some wedding videos from our site. See what triggers you as being the most important parts of the day that you don't want to miss out on having, and having keepsake of in your photos and videos.
As the owner of Applause Weddings, I encourage you to watch some wedding videos from our site. See what triggers you as being the most important parts of the day that you don't want to miss out on having, and having keepsake of in your photos and videos.
If we can help, inquire with us. We work in and around St. Louis Missouri and sometimes we are available for travel!
Visit us at: http://applauseweddings.com
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